Whether you’ve got some suspicions about your partner’s fidelity or just a little curious, take this quiz to find out if your partner could be having an affair.

1. When you first started dating your boyfriend’s Blackberry phonebook was full of:
a. A few buddies, a few exes, and lots of random girls.
b. His buddies, his parents, and you.
c. His buddies, his parents, you…and a few random girls.

2. You’ve been talking all week about the really big, really important meeting you have at work on Friday afternoon, when you return home that evening he:
a. Isn’t even home. There is a note on the table saying he went for a few drinks with his buddies.
b. Immediately rushes in to ask how the meeting went.
c. Doesn’t say anything but as soon as you mention it he takes a genuine interest in hearing about how it went.

3. His phone rings during a date and you get a glimpse of an unfamiliar number, he:
a. Doesn’t make eye contact and takes the phone into the other room to take the call.
b. Answers it and starts chatting away right next to you.
c. Ignores it.

4. You’re out at a bar and he sees his best friend’s girl with another guy, he:
a. Ignores it and when you question him he says it is none of his business.
b. Pulls out his phone, takes a pic, sends it to his buddy, and then calls him right away.
c. Sends his friend a text telling him he just saw a girl who looks exactly like his girlfriend at the bar with another dude. From there he leaves the problem up to him.

5. You and your man sit down to have that serious talk about past relationships, his naughty little secret is:
a. That he cheated on his ex…a few times…but that “it was no big deal really”
b. That he has fantasized about other girls while in bed with his exes…but who hasn’t right?
c. That he cheated on his ex once but was so wracked with guilt he came clean and could never see himself doing it again.

6. A few months back you suggested that maybe your boyfriend should take up a new hobby. What did he do?
a. Nothing. But he does seem to be taking a lot more late night meetings at work.
b. Signed himself up for cooking classes so that he could finally make you a romantic dinner once and a while.
c. Bought a membership to the city’s most exclusive gym and all of a sudden has the body of a Greek god.

7. Your sex life…
a. Is virtually non-existent
b. Is just as great as it always was.
c. Has its ups and downs. But that happens to every couple after a while…right?

Mostly A’s: He’s probably cheating

The very fact that you are doing this test is the first clue that you may have some suspicions about your partners fidelity, says Al Duncan, owner of the confidential investigation company Toronto PI. “What I always tell clients seeking help is that no one knows the individual party better then the client themselves – if a client has enough suspicion and worry that it drives them to the point where they call out for help, then usually their gut instinct is right”. Withdrawal of sexual activity, mysterious phone calls, and an increase in work meetings or late night activities are all signs that could mean your suspicions are correct. Your best bet is to sit your man down for a chat and explain all the changes you’ve noticed and give him a chance to explain. He may come clean and he may not. Either way you will have to decide if you will ever be able to trust him enough to live with what he may or may not have done.

Mostly B’s: He’s probably not cheating

He is so into you that he wouldn’t give a second look to a full truckload of Hooters girls. The guy who remembers things that are important to you and who is eager to make an effort to make you as happy as you make him is a guy who has no interest in being with anyone but the lovely lady by his side (that’s you!)

Mostly C’s: He could be cheating

This guy is a tricky one. This is the guy who likes to flirt, the guy who likes to go to the gym as much as he likes to admire his physique in the mirror, the guy who’s cheated before but swears he could never do it again. Basically, this is the guy that you haven’t trusted since day one. It is here that you have to decipher whether or not your man is actually acting suspiciously or whether you are just taking his behaviors and blowing them out of proportion because of your insecurities. Your best bet here is to be straight out and let him know that you are having issues trusting him and his behaviors. Chances are that if he’s not cheating he’ll make the efforts to change his ways. Most important here is to give him the benefit of the doubt. And if you can’t, then it is time to find yourself a new man….with a clean slate.

Al Duncan is a retired Detective Sergeant and was one of the longest serving members of the Toronto Police Service Internal Affairs Unit. His company Toronto PI offers a reliable and completely confidential service to members of the general public and corporate law offices in the areas of surveillance, missing persons, domestic and child custody matters, computer forensics, civil and criminal investigations. For more information visit www.torontopi.com or email info@torontopi.com

A new romance can be completely encompassing but here are three steps to maintain your relationships when you fall in love.

The euphoria of a new romance can be addictive, thrilling and…time-consuming. And while nurturing an exciting new relationship is entirely healthy, it is easy to fall off the face of the planet during this time.

There are three key relationships that need to be continually nurtured throughout your life: your romantic relationships, your friendships, and your own self. Here’s how:

1. Don’t change your priorities

Understandably, your new relationship will become an additional priority in your life. However, this does not mean adding a new person to your life results in the exclusion of others, because your friends need you too. Psychotherapist, Ellen Starr says she sees this all the time when people start a new romantic relationship. ‶[You must] know that your support network of friends are there [for you], and it is important continue to nurture that.”

2. Introduce everyone

Introducing your new love interest to your friends may feel like you’re throwing them to the wolves but this is an important step to make your friends feel included in your life. Keeping the two groups separate will only lead to resentment and eventually detachment.

However it is still important to have date nights separate from your friends. “Romantic relationships in your twenties is part of developing, and it can be difficult when your friends place their own judgements on your boyfriend or girlfriend,” says Starr. When it comes down to it, you want to make decisions about your relationship on your own terms and not hold your friends accountable for your choices.

3. Get a life

Abandoning the interests and activities that you had prior to your relationship not only changes who they were initially attracted to, but it also changes who you are to your friends. “Young people should view having a life outside of the romantic relationship as a way to keep the relationship alive,” says Starr. Spending time with your friends, and engaging in activities without your significant other will make not only your friendships stronger, but keep your romance alive.

A lot of myths go around about what common-law actually is — don’t get your definition of common-law from friends or TV. Here’s how to protect yourself in a common-law relationship.

According to Statistics Canada, nearly 700,000 people in Ontario choose to forego a trip down the aisle and live in a common-law relationship instead.

In Ontario, a Common-law relationship is defined under the family law act as two people, whether opposite or same-sex, who have been living together for at least three years or have a child and have been living together for some permanence.

Although some people refer to common-law relationships as common-law marriages, they’re wrong. Such a marriage does not exist because a common-law relationship is strictly a relationship. There’s no legal contract required to have one or to end one. Once the relationship is over, it’s over. While there are many similarities between common-law relationships and marriage, there are differences as well.

Common-law 101: property rights

Myth: In a common-law relationship, I have the same property rights as married couples.

Wrong! This is one of the biggest myths Fred Streiman from Dale, Streiman, Kurtz Barristers and Solicitors hears. The property each spouse brings into a common-law relationship continues to belong to that person once the relationship ends. For instance, real estate, vehicles, furniture, financial assets like RRSPs, businesses, even debt – anything you personally own, belongs to you. But, if a couple jointly purchases goods, then both spouses have to share the value or debt incurred.

Lesley Chitra and her partner are high school sweethearts. Prior to getting married, the couple lived in a common-law relationship. But before deciding to take the big step, Chitra did some research and sought legal advice on how she could protect herself. Moving into a house that was under her spouses name, Chitra decided to document everything she contributed to the relationship such as bills, division of labour, and other contributions she made to the house.

“I contributed in terms of furnishing the home and paying bills and what not, whereas he primarily handled the housing.”

Through Chitra’s research, she knew by documenting such things, if she and her spouse were to split, she could argue in court that she should be compensated for her contributions.

For Jennifer Santino, the situation was different. Santino was in a common-law relationship for over five years and during that time she and her partner equally contributed to expenses. When the relationship ended, Santino continued to pay bills that had been incurred by both herself and her partner during the relationship because the bills were in her name.

“I paid thousands extra,” says Santino who admits to not knowing her rights. Looking back, “I’d do more research … and look at my legal responsibilities.”

Common-law 101: spousal and child support

Couples have the responsibility to financially support each other just like married couples. However, unlike married couples, when the relationship ends, spouses in a common–law relationship have a time limit of two years from the time of the split to apply for spousal support from the other person.

But when it comes to child support, a time limit does not exist. A child has a right to be supported regardless if their parents are married or not.

Common-law 101: benefits

Common-law couples may have access to a variety of their spouses’ benefits such as employee benefits, CPP benefits, and welfare benefits. Many benefits have different regulations, time frames, and definitions as to what they consider to be common-law. It’s always best to check to see if you’re eligible for such benefits.

Common-law 101: protect yourself

So what can you do to protect yourself from getting blind-sided after dissolving a common-law relationship?

Streiman suggests couples get a cohabitation agreement or something known as a domestic contract. A domestic contract is a legal document stating how you and your partner want your property, finances, or any legal decisions about the relationship dealt with.

“It avoids uncertainty,” says Streiman, who also adds these contracts may save time and avoid a nasty court battle. Streiman advises couples to sit down and figure out what they would like to put in their contract, because you’ll be putting your time, money and emotions at risk without one.